Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
