Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
