ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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