Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Randomize