I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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