Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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