I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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