best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
