wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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