i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
