I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize