i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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