your room smells of hookers.
And success
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
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Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
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Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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