i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
the day after is always just damage control
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
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I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
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The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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