I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
