he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize