so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
