Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
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...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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