The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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