Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
