This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Randomize
