he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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