he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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