Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
