kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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