I'd wear matching sweaters with you
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
