oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
