around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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