dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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