what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
