do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
