Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
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Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
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It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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