you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
