Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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