it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
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how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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