my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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