in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.