i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
