put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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