nut hugger
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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