Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
