Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize