We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
