he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
