Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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