She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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