On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize