well you can't waste a boner
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
