You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
