Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
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U took a sewing needle to his nipple
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
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I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.