I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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